A day inside a Bolivian jail

Have you ever been offered a line of cocaine in prison? This photo was taken inside San Pedro Prison in La Paz, Bolivia. You put the cocaine on the mirror and snort it. So what were we doing inside this prison cell, you wonder. We bribed the inmates and the police to give us a tour. Don't worry, this is the thing to do in Bolivia's capital. We were treated like royal guests and even offered one gram of pure cocaine at the discounted price of 100 Bolivianos ($25AUD or $14USD). The Australian girl we were with got a bit scared when our "tour guide" left us inside a cell and closed the door. But everything was fine. We met the children and wives who live inside, walked past the hairdresser's, visited the pool room, tried some prison baked cake and had a chat to a cocaine addict who hadn't slept in a week (that's him yawning in the photo). If you can afford it, you get private bathroom and amenities. If you're poor, you live in miserable conditions with 3 or 4 other prisoners in the one cell and clean all day. Our inmate tour guide was paranoid about getting his throat slashed for some reason. If this blog post sounds a bit warped and random, you can only imagine what the actual experience was like. If we recall correctly, our first words when we left were, "That was f***ing weird".

Inca Trail to the Lost City

"Machu Picchu" sounds like a Pokemon character but it means "old peak" in Quechua. It's also known as the Lost City of the Incas and, from far away, could pass as an ancient miniature golf course. Like all stunning landscapes, it looks like a fake backdrop until you get there and know that it's actually real. After trekking 44 kilometres, up to a height of 4215 metres above sea level over 4 days, coming face-to-face with Machu Picchu was like finally meeting someone we had heard so much about before. Completing the Inca Trail and being rewarded with seeing this new Wonder of The World, is one more item now crossed off our list of things to do before we die. We were very lucky to share this experience with our great friends, Mel and Dan.

Living in the Amazon jungle

The jungle. The Amazon jungle. We lived in the Ecuadorian Amazon jungle for almost 4 weeks with the Indigenous Shuar community. No electricity, no running water, no beds, no cars. A wasp built two nests in our room. A dog slept directly under us beneath the floor boards. A swarm of 20-30 butterflies flew around our house and one sat on Dean’s forehead for 10 minutes. A huge prickly caterpillar was lying on Dean’s pillow one morning and stung him. Two tarantulas lived in our roof. We bathed, washed our clothes and dishes in the river. We taught English at the local primary school and donated resources. Dean learnt to make spears and hunt. Lina learnt to put in contact lenses without a mirror. We built bamboo walls with machetes, wore gum boots and became Solitaire experts. We ate frog, lizard, snail and other interesting animals. We learnt about hallucinogenic medicinal plants, shrunken heads (tsantsa) and Shuar culture. We fell alseep to rain on the tin roof, saw rainbows, played cards by candlelight and swept ants out of the house. We have had the most amazing experience, one that we could not have bought.

Never go hungry in the jungle

These massive maggot looking creepy-crawly things live in the jungle. We were spared from eating them raw, the way the locals do, and tried them grilled. It's impossible to go hungry in the jungle. There's always something to eat. Just go to a tree and pull out some frogs, dig a hole for lizards, search the river for snails or hunt deer, armadillo, rabbit. Dean was invited to eat monkey, an offer he graciously accepted. For vegetarian options, hand pick wild mushrooms, pineapples, fruits and other plants.

Our first year wedding anniversary

How do you celebrate your first year wedding anniversary in the Amazon jungle? Well, we recommend the following. Walk one and a half hours to the bus stop and take a two hour bus ride into the nearest town. Buy food so you can cook up a storm in your house that has no electricity. Some examples of fine food: Nutella, Forrero Rocher chocolates, burritos, marshmallows, chips and the best $3 bottle of red wine available. The bus could break down on the way back so be prepared to walk a couple of hours in pitch black darkness, down a mountain and through muddy swamps. Any thoughts of the real possibility of being bitten by a snake in the middle of the jungle or that you are lost should be rejected immediately as they enter your mind. When you finally arrive at your house at 10:30pm, take a naked bath in the river before passing out in bed. Spend the next day alone with your spouse, have nutella pancakes for breakfast, tuna burritos for lunch, skip dinner for dessert, wine and toasted camp fire marshmallows. Be totally mesmerised about where you are and what you are doing and fully enjoy every moment.

Walk in someone else´s shoes

There’s a steep mountain we have to climb to get out of the jungle. Think of about 800 very deep step-ups or lunges you would do at the gym, but on hard rocks, through slippery mud, spider webs, past tree branches, sometimes after a night of heavy rain and in uncomfortable rubber boots. That’s part of the walk we had to do to catch the bus into the nearest town. We only did it three times and it was tough. It’s the same walk that three children have to do every day to get home from school and it takes them over 2 hours round trip. They are 8, 5 and 3 years old. One day after school, the 3 year old (who, by the way, has burns all over his legs from a gas explosion) cried and refused to walk home. Dean carried him for the whole 40 minute walk from the school to our house and he fell asleep in Dean’s arms. The children rested at our house while it rained. Then, they all walked up the mountain to get back home, including the little one. It’s the closest we got to walking in their shoes.